Thursday, August 25, 2011

A Letter from the Tooth Fairy

My daughter lost her first tooth this week and it was quite the historic occasion as it had been wiggling for nearly 2 weeks.

My wife and I finally had enough and just pulled the thing out. Which wouldn’t have been too bad if it weren’t for blood that appeared everywhere which, in turn, ended up completely freaking her out. She kept screaming while crying, “OH NO!!! I’m spilling BLOOD!!! Now vampires are going to EAT ME!!!”

Her ex-nanny was really into Twilight.

The drama was finally over after I calmly explained that vampires only live in the Seattle area, then she became excited wondering how much the tooth fairy was going to leave her.

Oh yeah…completely forgot about that part.

Her friends at school have told her that they’ve gotten anywhere between $2-10 a tooth, which I find a little much. In my day, I remember getting a quarter ($.25) and that was only if I didn’t swallow or lose it first. My wife on the other hand didn’t get any money, the tooth fairy in Ohio left her underwear and socks.
My daughter didn’t want underwear or socks, “just the money.”

I reassured her that there wasn’t anything to worry about as we don’t live in Ohio and we weren’t planning on moving there anytime soon.

“Good! That sounds like a bad place to lose a tooth” she replied with relief.

After she tucked her tooth behind the pillow and we kissed her goodnight she asked, “What does the tooth fairy do with all of the teeth anyway?”

“I don’t know? Maybe she’ll write you a letter...”

So after my wife and I negotiated and settled on a sum of $2, without addition of socks or underwear, she ran to the ATM and then stopped somewhere to get change while I was at home writing.

Here's the letter:

Dear Gillian,

My name is Natasha and I’ve been assigned to be your Tooth Fairy! Thank you for the shiny, well-brushed tooth. I can tell you’ve taken really good care of it. Because of its condition I have left $2.00 USD in its place.

In case you were wondering, most teeth go into the Tooth Fairy collection vault in the Tooth Fairy castle in the clouds where they are guarded by large white unicorns to keep vampires away. But sometimes special ones, like yours, are used for new babies.
Don’t worry! Your baby brother already has all of his baby teeth so he won’t be getting any of yours. That would be kind of gross, wouldn’t it? (LOL!)

I look forward to working with you. Next time leave freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.


“Tooth Fairy #227”

P.S. I’m SO glad you don’t live in Ohio. The law there requires us to give underwear and socks instead of money.

And here's a printable Tooth Fairy letter in case you want to make one of your own..
(Click to print)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Summer Camp Ruined My Kids’ Career Ambitions

Tomorrow is my daughter’s last day of Summer Camp and for the most part it’s been a pretty good experience for her. Especially after spending that initial month with our visiting teenage niece from Ohio (read previous post for more on that.)

She’s made lots of new friends at Camp, her days have been filled with lots of activities and field trips to places that I am grateful they take her to so that I don’t have to.
Well just one place really, “Chuck E. Cheese’s” or as I like to call it, “Yuck E. Piece’s.”

When she came home after a field trip there she proudly announced, “Daddy, guess what? They built Chuck E. Cheese back after that fire you said burned it down! Hooray!!”

I keep wondering if she would believe it caught fire again.

Summer Camp has different themes daily and today was “When I grow up…” Day. The kids had to draw a picture of what they wanted to be when they grow up, then at the end of the day dress in that role and then talk about why they chose it.
So of course these were lots of Doctor’s, Astronauts, Football Players, Magicians, Singer’s, Musician’s, Teachers, Artists, etc.
My daughter held out her rolled picture of what she wanted to be and eagerly asked me to open it.
I kept wondering which of the many things it was as she’s had quite a career range these past few years: Artist (just like Daddy!), Ballerina, A Pink Truck (when she was nearly 3), Teacher, and most recently a Veterinarian.

Nope, none of it - she wants to be a cleaning lady:

(Actual drawing is on the wall at Camp, but will be posted… )

When I asked her what happened to a career in the field of Veterinarian arts, she said that she changed her mind because if a Tiger came in she would be scared and cry.

And cleaning ladies get to use vacuums, just like the ones they use in Summer Camp.