Monday, November 05, 2007

Colonel Sanders and Santa Claus Must Be Brothers. Or Just Angels Sent From Heaven

Today began like any other: woke up, showered, ate cold chicken out of a bucket for breakfast, got my daughter ready, sang ELO’s “Evil Woman” on the way to work -- pretty much how billions of other people’s day begins.
Except today day was different. Today I got a note from KFC (yes, “them”) complimenting me about my Colonel Sanders pumpkin and THEN sending “ME” KFC gift checks.

It may be November, but it sure feels a lot like Christmas morning.

(The remainder of this post will be in a southern accent to pay homage to Colonel Sanders, aka: the great originator of fried chicken in a bucket.)

Those who’ve been readin’ this here blog for a while know I’ve been the biggest fan of this here “Kentucky Fried Chicken” (later renamed “KFC” for the hearin’, and maybe readin’, impaired…) ever since I was a wee youngin’.
Maybe it’s because there’s somethin’ comfortin’ about fried chickin’, mashed potatoes, slaw, bisk-ets, after coming home from school, work, prison (ha, just pulling ya’ britches!)
Or maybe because I find it funny that a southern gent in a white suit, calls himself “the Colonel” and then sells fried chickin’ in a bucket. Hoot and hollerin’, side-splittin’ funny!
And the chicken ain’t bad either. Seriously, who doesn’t like deep-fried chicken? Only Satan himself. And maybe hippies. I just love the spicy kind they make -- which ironically isn’t available at all locations...(the Colonel makes me drive to Pasadena to get that special stuff. Making me risk ma’ life dodging ol’ people in their Lincoln intercontinental's and such…)

Around six moonshines ago, I wrote an open letter to the colonel (when they changed their chicken oil to non-trans fat) vowin’ I would never eat that there chickin’ again. That following week I was back again like a whiny drug-addict (sorry Waya and MetroDad…I just couldn’t get on that Popeye’s bandwagon… maybe if it came in a bucket and Mr. Popeye wore a white suit things would be different…)

CONTEST! WIN CHICKEN! (Come on, who doesn't like FREE chicken?)
And guess what the prize is? KFC chicken checks! (thanks to them colonels’ folks.) All you have to do is leave a comment with your email (so I know how to contact you if you win) and tell me a fact about Kentucky (or hippies!)

The fine print: Winners based on originality. Contest only open to US residents and maybe Canadians.
O.k., Canadians can play too (this time!!!) Sorry to my peeps in NZ, Australia, UK, and Ohio. Oh, and some weird people in Malaysia who are always searching my blog for “husbands drinking wife’s breastmilk” – those people aren't eligible for any contest (ever!)

41 comments:

  1. I don't know anything about Kentucky, other than it is the "Bluegrass State" -- but I will have that ELO song stuck in my head for days . . . except I used to think the words were "heeeee's a woman". Whatever.

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  2. Anonymous1:36 AM

    Hey! I am blogging from Malaysia!

    What kinda Malaysians do you hang with?? ;)

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  3. I don't know nuthin' 'bout much, but I'm pretty sure them hippies don't eat no KFC whether they's from Kentucky or not.

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  4. Anonymous5:55 AM

    Traitor! I can't believe you went back to the Colonel. I thought you had come over to the dark side. Now, I have to go recruit more members for the Popeyes' army. We will prevail!

    P.S. Check your e-mail.

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  5. Kentucky's where dem horsies race. I knewed it.... Them is purdy.

    ;)

    Congrats on your free chicken! Very cool that KFC acknowledged it. You deserved it, that pumpkin was awesome!!!

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  6. It begins with a "K." That is about all I know :-)

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  7. I think Kentucky is one of only a few states that are officially commonwealths. I have no earthly idea what that means, but I love fried chicken.

    P.S. Some hippies like fried chicken too.

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  8. Give me them checks fool or I'll send my hoodz after your Asian @ss NOW!! You know I'm their #2 fan, after you of course! I better win or else!

    That is awesome Tony but dude, the no trans-fat recipe tastes like cardboard! And I don't know why they did away with the spicy recipe as well. Did you tell them KFC folks that the Col. might be rolling over in his grave?

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  9. Anonymous9:29 AM

    I know Kentucky make some damn fine bourbon.

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  10. My mom was born in Kentucky. They sing "My Old Kentucky Home" just before "the Run for the Roses." My grandfather killed a man in the 1930s in Harlan, Kentucky trying to unionize the coalminers. Both my grandparents ate at The Colonel's original restaurant. I've had to visit relatives there off and on throughout my 45 years. That alone should make me the winner...wiener? Whiner?

    Tennessee makes better sour mash.

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  11. dude you're a scream!
    and we get the spicy chicken in all the kfc's here!!!
    and why would satan not like it...??!?

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  12. I'm not one for fancy book learnin', so instead, I would like to express my love for KFC through poetry.

    There once was a man from Kentucky
    Whose chickens were very un-lucky
    He made them all fatter
    Then fried them in batter
    Yessiree’ that Colonel was plucky.

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  13. how come people from ohio are excluded from the contest? lol...

    i don't know much about kentucky, but if you don't have anyone to dump those checks on, i'll take one. i'm addicted to their snackers...

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  14. Hmmm... Kentucky is the 37th largest state in terms of land area, and ranks 26th in population. Oh, and the state capitol is Frankfurt.

    Do I win? Do I win?

    epiexoto@yahoo.com
    http://epixstix.blogspot.com

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  15. Nice post, Huck.

    I don't have any facts, but I did notice in a recent KFC commercial that they were using the full name Kentucky Fried Chicken again...I suppose that is a fact.

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  16. fact: the dirtiest motel i ever slept in was located in erlanger, kentucky.

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  17. that's so cool!

    I know nothing about Kentucky, but i did, when we were on a camping vacation as a child, beg for KFC chicken for my birthday. and I got it. :)

    pntdmaypole AT yahoo DOT com

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  18. I am in Michigan for a month and happen to drive past the KFC General Offices yesterday. I couldn't help but think of you. Hmmmm....wonder if I mention your name I can get me a tour.

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  19. Diana -- AMENDED: Ohio isn't excluded. Apparently it is part of the US...?
    (The wife has family there, it's easy to pick on)

    beta mom -- WOW!! You're poetry skills are amazing. Are you a rapper?
    Maybe not, you didn't mention anything about your umbrella.

    angel -- What magical place are you from that "SPICY" is everywhere...heaven?

    Ben & Bennie -- Wow! A fact about Kentucky and hippies...

    wayabetty -- Am I an honanary asian?!? That's cool! As for spicy, I'm hoping they listen to my plea's making spicy available to the masses.

    MetroDad -- We've got "the Colonel" on our side. And I think he knows southern karate.

    JLow -- That's the trouble, I don't want to hang with these people. I'm afraid of the kind of drinks they'll offer me.

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  20. Hum I could easily google facts about Kentucky, but I'd rather not.

    How about buffet style KFC's? I've only ever been inside one.

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  21. Greetings from NoCal Creative-Type. Thanks for stopping by the West Sacramento Photo of the Day.

    Regards,
    Barbara Smith

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  22. I've heard that Kentucky still has a law on the books legally requiring citizens to bathe like once a month.

    heh.

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  23. Oops. Make that once a year, not a month.

    Limited bathing...doesn't that include hippies too?

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  24. How about this:
    Kentucky currently has no pro hockey. None.

    If I win, you'll have to send me double the prizes since your dollar ain't 'zactly worth much up here nowadays.

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  25. I hope I didn't send this twice...

    Hippies have to eat KFC, it's their munchie staple.

    Here is a fact about Kentucky: it sucks.

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  26. Denguy -- I know!!! What's up with that? My chicken buck won't get as many wings up there.

    Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake -- what are you talkin' bout? Hippies don't bathe...ever!!

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  27. First up, that was an awesome pumpkin!

    Now, as for Kentucky... I'll go with its impressive track record of providing reality tv with the stereotypical southerner the viewing public craves (ref: David and Mary from The Amazing Race, the freaky kid on Kid Nation from last night, and Chicken from Survivor)

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  28. Ok, so maybe we here in Ohio helped steal the odd election or two, BUT I do have to make the claim to being a US resident and even, if I might dare, a citizen.

    Even the Colonel hisself opened a few establishments here in the State.

    however, in lieu of the Chicken Check, I might have to check into this 'husband's drinking wife's breastmilk' thing...

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  29. I bet commies don't like it, either.

    It's true, though, about how they put a spice in it to make you crave it fortnightly, then?

    But about Kentucky... does it strike you as ironic that it is the state most populated not by chickens, but by turkeys? (Also deer, but they wouldn't fit in a bucket, even a really big 20-piece one.)

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  30. Merry Christmas!!!

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  31. I miss trans fat.

    But I lurves me sum fried chicky!

    Merry Early Christmas!

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  32. kittenpie -- I don't know, I think anything can fit in a bucket.

    dennis -- If you ever offer me a drink, I'm not taking it...

    SciFi Dad -- A guy names "Chicken" from Kentucky...? WOW!

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  33. Anonymous11:59 AM

    Okay you've done it. I GOT TO HAVE ME SOME FRIIIIIIEDDDD CHICKEN! I've been vegan/vegetarian whatever you like and have had no fried chicken in years.

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  34. I've got nothing to say about Kentucky. But fried chicken is god's greatest gift to man. The Big Guy was clearly working through the Colonel when the whole chicken-in-a-bucket thing came into being.

    And honestly, I can taste it now. Too bad we are having soup for dinner.

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  35. Ah, I don't want to make you jealous or anything, but when I lived in KY I visited the one and only...Kentucky Fried Chicken museum. Really. That Col. Harlan Sanders was something else, I tell ya.

    I think they should fly you there and give you a finger lickin' tour!

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  36. Ruth Dynamite -- Wow. I bow in respect.

    Is it really called "the finger lickin' tour"?? Because if it is, my life will be complete after I finish the tour...

    Em -- I guess the Colonel was somehow related to Moses.

    mrsmogul -- Funny story: I was a vegetarian for 13 years. 13 years not eating at the colonels! And then one day while driving past a KFC, I wanted to eat it...really, really bad.
    That's when I discovered "spicy".

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  37. Best.Post.Evah.

    We get Spicy in every KFC in Australia too. I'm not keen on the new "Hot Shots" though - i'm more a Crispy Strips Chick.

    Ok, this is sounding a bit Malaysian now..

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  38. Anonymous10:23 AM

    I've got nothing.

    But that's not stopping me from laughing at, er, I mean, with you.

    LOL.

    And thanks, for including us Canucks. We love us some fried chicken up here...

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  39. Creative,

    Kentucky, "My Old Kentucky" Home is also referred to as the Bluegrass State. Colonel is just an honorary title that can be bestowed by the Governor of Kentucky.

    I have a picture of my parents meeting the Colonel on the Belle of Louisville paddleboat.

    I love the bucket and would love to win.

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  40. Kentucky's State Soil is Crider:
    Crider Soil Profile
    Surface layer: brown silt loam
    Subsoil - upper: reddish brown silt loam
    Subsoil - middle: dark red silty clay loam
    Subsoil - lower: dark red clay.

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  41. Anonymous8:25 AM

    More than 30 years ago I met the colonel as i worked in one of his stores in West Australia. Luckily I have a photo to prove it as my children think he is just a cartoon character!

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