Tuesday, December 05, 2006
When You Smell Alcohol On The Dentist, It May Be Time To Scream.
I started getting a little nervous this morning while waiting in “the chair” when the dentist walked in late and told the assistant (in a loud whisper) she was out until 1am closing a local restaurant bar – and she had a headache to prove it.
When she got closer to me, she smelled like my old great uncle ‘Pete’ (the one who hung out at the racetracks, smoked cigars for breakfast, and always offered strangers cookies), which made me even more nervous. I started to scream, on the inside, when she dropped the tools on the floor and said the sound of the metal tools hitting the floor made her want to squeal like a fish (yes, 'fish')
Her usual unintelligible slurring didn’t bother me though (she has some Persian accent... at least I think it’s Persian – or could be from some remote village in Canada) my wife and I usually make jokes later about things we think or thought she said to us like, “My horse is in the bathroom” or “Brittany needs to buy underwear.” In reality, she’s actually saying stuff like “Rinse your mouth in the bathroom” or “Brittany needs to buy underwear.”
I've always had bad luck with dentists, they all creep me out and my wife and I have been through a lot. These people are hard to find. This one has been pretty good over the last year; I’m almost inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt - this time. But if this happens again, the search is on. Although, I’m sure she would be a good drinking buddy down at the racetracks.
What would you do….?