Friday, February 01, 2008

Now I Know What Willis Was "talkin' bout"...

Weird Searches
I find it odd what people search for on the internet. I find it even more odd that some of these searches end up here. Here are some recent ones with added commentary:

does michael bolton own starbucks? -- Yes!
what's wrong with my toddler? -- He/she's probably broken. If you still have the receipt - take him/her back...you still might get store credit.
tony danza's meatballs -– There are some truly disgusting people out there.
is chef boyardee meat real? Depends on your definition of "real"?
i drank my wife's breast milk yesterday Why is it these searches always come from Malaysia? Ohio I can expect, but Malaysia?
creative way to tell husband that you are expecting –- Tell him you were impregnated by aliens
my name is poopOk...
do truck drivers wear diapersYes!
is chuck e cheese ok for 2 year olds? Yes! It’s just not O.K. for adults.
wierdest thig about lionel ritchie -- the mustache. And he dances on the ceiling.
peeing through an ice cream cone -- I've never tried...

KFC Valentine – Because chicken isn’t the only thing that’s spicy
I was once told that on Valentines day, the Japanese forgo expensive restaurants, flowers, chocolate, jewelry, talking, etc. and just stop by the local KFC on the way home before turning on the Barry White Greatest Hits CD and filling the bathtub with Jell-O.
When I first heard that story, I couldn’t help to think, “now that’s a tradition worth starting in this country.” And because Jell-O’s involved, I’m sure our friends up in Canada wouldn’t mind joining in the festivities too.

Here's something to help kick-off this centuries old Japanese tradition:

"Baby, you do chicken right. Happy Valentine's Day"

25 comments:

SciFi Dad said...

We have started a similar thing since our daughter was born, but with Chinese takeout instead of KFC (although maybe this year I'll be able to convince her otherwise).

Yes, it would be nice to get a sitter and go to a restaurant, but it's also nice to have 2 valentines.

painted maypole said...

hmmm.... i wonder what my hubby will think when I give him that card for Valentine's day....

♥♥♥ A- Licious ♥♥♥ said...

.....hehehhe tooo funny!!

Queen of Shake-Shake said...

Let's embrace the Orient this year and forgo it all too. Even the Jello.

dennis said...

hey! we still read your blog here in Ohio!!

and we never were allowed to...ummm...tried to drink wife.imp's milk when she was pregnant!!

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Um, I once made blueberry muffins with my breastmilk. Lighter flavor, sweeter, too.

Seriously, though, you just need to marry the Colonel and get it over with!

Sarah O. said...

The Valentine's KFC/Barry White/Jell-o mentions ought to produce some interesting internet search hits.

Whit said...

Nothing says love like a bucket from the Colonel.

Dad Stuff said...

So, are you a 'breast' or 'leg' man?

mama speak said...

LOL.
I'm just curious, how do you get a tub of jello? I mean no matter how much you mix it w/water you still have to make it cold or it's just slimy water....or am I missing the point. (I'm just saying...)

Wish I could get on the KFC bandwagon w/you but I think we're going to have to go the route of the "red dinner" this year. Oh, don't go there; the G'parents are visiting during this week, so we'll make a dinner of heart shaped red things, like: jell-o and ummmm....swedish fish, maybe some red cookies, Hawaiian punch...suddenly KFC doens't sound so bad.

Tismee2 said...

Sorry if it sounds like i'm complaining here, but we just got a KFC here in my town (yes I know, but it is England and we do live 'up north')
and everytime we stop there they are always 'out' of something we want. Is this just a teething problem or is it standard for any fast food chain in the UK?
Oh and they always make it sound like it's OUR fault that they have run out, - "hey if you lot didn't come and buy so much stuff we wouldn't run out" type of attitude.

Good old blighty!

Aimee Greeblemonkey said...

I literally burst out laughing. My searches are NEVER as good.

Lisa said...

"is chuck e cheese ok for 2 year olds? Yes! It’s just not O.K. for adults."

indeed!! run from the rat!

Ben & Bennie said...

Talk about disgusting, if you ever have someone arrive at your site using the term "enema" don't ever mention it on your blog.

Pageant Mom said...

For some reason, I am having gastric issues after I eat KFC now... something about no more trans fats... and it sucks!!! I love it though (even though I have to stay close to a bathroom afterwards)

Valentines day here is no big deal, just a card and a big I LOVE YOU!! (the kids end up getting the gifts LOL)

The Real Mother Hen said...

Ha the searches are funny, and creative! :)

Ohhhh KFC on Valentine's Day is a good idea.. I might just do it :)

PS: In the US, I believe KFC does very well on Mother's Day.

Maureen said...

Nothin' says Happy Valentine's Day more than a meal for which you will need an angioplasty soon after.

Yikes.

Tiff said...

What I have always wanted a card from KFC for valentine's day! LOL

Velvet Verbosity said...

The last time I ate KFC, I spent 10 hours locked in the bathroom. Ok, so maybe it was the flu, but my stomach brain doesn't seem to know the difference. Just the sight of it now makes my stomach flip, and not in the good way that a first Valentine kiss does.

creative-type dad said...

The Real Mother Hen -- On mother's day? Father's day I would expect...

Tismee2 -- Wow! Maybe the workers are eating all the chicken? I know I would.

mama speak -- I never thought about that. Maybe I can Google "how to make Jell-O in the bathtub. I'm sure there's lots of advice on that.

Dad Stuff -- Spicy Popcorn.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter -- YUCK!! That's like something out of Fear Factor....

kittenpie said...

Well, you know us Canucks and our Jell-O... After all, it needs to be chilly to set, right?

carrie said...

Oooooooh, you sounded JUST like Barry White when you said that!

And seriously, what is it with men and the breastm*lk? Yuk.

Scarlett Wanna Be said...

Chicken? Jell-O? A bathtub? Yes! and believe me, it is delicious. I would say finger lickin' good but that is just too far.

wayabetty said...

Tony, we had the spicy chicken from KFC this past Sat. and let me tell you, it's very disappointing! It was not even spicy at all and w/o the trans fat...it's certainly not finger lickin' good!!

creative-type dad said...

wayabetty -- Maybe somebody replaced your chicken with Folger's Crystals...?

kittenpie - Yes, it does need to be chilly... isn't all of Canada chilly?