Thursday, September 21, 2006
It’s NOT 'A Facial', It’s A 'MEN’s Facial' (And Midgets!)
So my wife and I had dinner with another married couple recently - close friends that we’ve known for awhile. Guy friend and I are talking “L.A. guy” stuff like movies, vacations, weird people at work who dress funny, ‘how cool would it be if Jessica Alba worked at Hooters’, etc. and then the conversation goes into something like this (paraphrasing, of course):
Guy Friend: So I got this really great Facial recently at this place call ‘Peaches and Cream’…
Me: What chou talkin’ bout, Willis!?! You mean like with Jello puddin’ on your face and cucumbers on your eyes….like what chicks do?
Guy Friend: No, no. Not like that, it’s a Men’s Facial…and let me tell you… It was heaven(!)…
Me: …a “Men’s Facial” at a place called “Peaches and Cream”??? I don’t get it, what constitutes this as a “Men’s Facial”…do they smear your face with motor oil, rinse with micro-brew beer, and then slap your face to moisturize…?
Guy Friend: No, no. They use ‘organic’ oils from exotic places like Las Vegas, and creams from endangered plants in the rainforest…(blah, blah, blah…)…you should try it; it’ll help you. You have BIG pores…
Me: ((“big” pores…..I do?))
Guy Friend:…and then there’s this place nearby where they do the best massages. They have these Thai midget women that jump on your back and like scream or dance….whoa-oh! And let me tell you...it’s heaven!
Me: Midgets, you say?
And the whole time the wives are talking about babies or something like that, totally ignoring us. I’m ambivalent about this ‘Facial’ thing, but the angry Thai midgets jumping on my back sounds like something definitely worth checking out. At least once.