Thursday, February 22, 2007
The Future is NOW! Choosing the Gender Of Your Baby In Minutes
I was speaking with a fellow co-worker/parent today about kids. Actually, I should rephrase that - she was pretty much doing the majority of the talking about how great it must be to have a girl.
She wants a girl really bad. Little girls haunt her all the time, in her dreams, on the TV, movies, magazines, on the streets - with their “cute clothes” and “cute hairstyles”…she went on and on (like a love struck teenybopper talking about NKOB.) She and her husband have two boys, one 5 and the other 3. After talking for about 10 minutes straight, she saw the look on my face and said “What? I love my boys… I just wish they were girls!”
I told her if she wanted all that - why not just buy a doll? Or trade in one of her boys in for a girl on Craigslist (the initial look on her face was, “Really? You can do that!!!”…)
She’s trying to convince her husband that they should have another. And to be sure she gets her girl she has done some research and found some place over in Pasadena that claims it has a 77% chance of getting your chicken right. First of all, I'm no doctor and I don’t know much about “science”, “sitcom ratings” and “what makes an airplane stay up in the air”, but aren’t these things a scam? I didn’t think you could do that. Isn’t it all a 50/50 chance, and maybe the “position” at “sexy time”?
I also think by giving a 77% claim, they’re protecting themselves. Because if you want X and get Y, well then you must be in the 23% - too bad (Pick up your consolation prize - Huggies samples and a discount coupon for another try on the way out the door.)
What does it cost you might be wondering? (I had to ask, is that rude...?) Only a mere $3,000, 10 minutes of her husbands time watching dirty videos, and 2 hours of her time. In fact, she can go back to work that same morning (I might consider changing jobs for that kind of money…)
Her husband doesn’t want another kid, but she has told him that if she gets pregnant – he can buy that Porsche he’s always wanted. I’m pretty sure he’s going to be taking the bait, along with some dirty movies thrown in to sweeten the deal.
Seriously, would you want to choose your baby’s gender? As for me, I don’t know. We have a girl, and I would like to have a boy for balance. But choosing seems so "commi-china" or “Madonna-Britney Hilton-Hasselhoff-ish”…