Thursday, February 08, 2007

Lionel Richie and A Midget (Little Person) Walk Into KFC, To Get A Facial And Tattoo - And Other Searches

I get some pretty odd searches to this site. Other parent blogs get real stuff related to kids, I get some of those too but not many for some odd reason. Here are a few, with my commentary attached:

midget massages - I know of a place where you can get one by angry Thai midgets

Stop nose picking toddler - They all do it. Get over it

lionel richie christmas sweater - If it existed, I'm sure the wife would have one

what type of people don't like football - People like me!

colonel sanders impersonator - If he's real, I want him deliver KFC to my job - everyday

mens painted toenails - Only men who wear Crocs do this

man perm - I haven’t seen a man-perm I never liked

manly feeling - Get a man perm, some chest hair, and a gold chain

substitute teacher whipped cream game - I don’t even know how to respond to this...

i have a midget and i am not afraid to use him!! - Me too! Let’s have them battle

tattoos of women saying daddy - Are they eating chicken too?

filipino doodlebop - Milli Vanilli (maybe just Vanilli)

midget women touching another women's boobs - Try Las Vegas. Or Art School.

toddler smears poop on walls - I hope they all don’t do that


Jess Riley said...

Midgets and poop...I'm sensing a theme! I'm also sensing that I might really enjoy this blog.

Today I got "adjectives starting with S." Which was Stupid.

I also got "Mackenzie Astin and gay," which I liked.

Diana said...

I haven't checked mine in so long- I'll have to check today and see what non-child related things bring people to me.
and tattoos of women saying daddy??? WTF? Is there a thought bubble above the woman??

dadinprogress said... there some hi def blog beneath the blog we're missing? I get the KFC, midgets and poop, but man perms and the sub teacher whipped cream game? i'd rather get your searches than the zillions of references to what I think are people looking for Web junk on fathers and daughters. Not the normal kind...but the daddy/little girl role play kind. scary.

Sarah O. said...

My friend Mrs. Perfect introduced me to The Doodlebops on TV.

I'm not sure which impressed me more: The impressively high quality of the costumes or the no-bones-about-it gayness of Moe and Rooney Doodle.

L.A. Daddy said...

Oh, I got that one of "Tattoos of Women saying Daddy" too! I'm all things "Daddy" know, and it really creeps me out.

There are people who don't like football? Freaks...

Maria said...

So anyway, I found your blog while doing a search for tattoed midgets with man perms eating whipped cream and discussing the rumor that when the colonel was a toddler he was a poop smearing football nut.

dennis said...

I want to play that Substitute Teacher game!!!

Jonathon said...

where are you hiding the midget porn?

wayabetty said...

KFC called Tony and they want YOU to be their next spokesperson! ;-)

sourpatchbaby said...

Well.....I do have to say that not all toddlers smear poop on walls. Some of them are kindergarteners. Since when is poop smeared midget tossing an approved substitute teacher game?

radioactive girl said...

I have never had any of my children smear poop on anything. Now that I wrote that, it will probably happen though.

Denver Dad said...

The weirdest sgoogle search that came up "Denver Dad" was for "moon boots." Apparently, my blog isn't HALF as fun as this one.

I agree with Dennis... I want to play the substitute teacher game too!

Diana said...

okay, I did mine and it was mostly people lookng for elmo graphics for their myspace pages. (grow up???)
There was one though that I thought you would like (and I don't get at all) and it was for :Diana diaper turkey.
Um, whaaaaaatttt?

InterstellarLass said...

I get some pretty kooky ones too. But never any about midgets. Mmm. Now I want some KFC! CHICKEN!

creative-type dad said...

InterstellarLass - me too

Diana - that's the strangest one I've heard. Did you poop a turkey in it?

Denver Dad/dennis - depends on who's the substitute.

wayabetty - I'd totally dress up in a white suit speaking in some weird southern accent if it meant all the popcorn chicken I ever wanted!

Maria - I really want to see this midget with a perm you speak of?

Sarah O. - I know what you mean! When Moe hides, I always wonder if he's going to jump out of Rooney Doodle's pants

Rob said...

Again, you're knocking Crocs without trying them. And I only paint my toenails on special occassions.

T. said...

Dude, I totally get turned on when I see a man in crocs with purple sparkle toenails, rocking his man perm which matches his curly chest hairs that peek out from his gaping shirt.

Of course, I'd call him daddy as we watched our midget porn in lieu of a football game and there would be some chicken eating too.

Wait, that came out wrong...

creative-type dad said...

T. - I swear, it's like we share the same brain. Except for the midget porn thing