Thursday, January 25, 2007
Welcome To California: Where It’s O.K. To Spank Your Spouse, Maid, Gardner, Neighbor, Waitress, Dog, Cat, But Not Your Kid
I guess I’m not surprised in a state like mine where smoking outdoors is banned because of global warming and lung cancer in birds, or something like that. There’s a new law being proposed out here banning parents from spanking their kids. Yes, really! It sounds jarring but it’s really directed at kids 3 and under. Which has me wondering when they’ll just expand it to all kids (they keep on referencing Sweden, which has a total ban on spanking, but ironically has no ban on picking up after your dog – I HATE that!)
Let me just say that I don’t spank my kid. At 18 months that’s ridiculous; but in a year or 3, if she happens to hold-up a 7-11 or takes the car out for a weekend joyride with the kiddies from Gymboree, well then, I’ll be happy to know that the option of spanking is there. I usually don’t talk politics but (standing on apple crate, national anthem begins…with waving flag behind me and a bald eagle named Julio on my arm…) I think the bored lawmakers are crossing the line again. I want the government to stay out of my house, out of my parenting, and out of people’s personal business. Yes, I know that there are extremes like you can’t eat your kid, or farm-raise puppies to sell in Ohio, but those are really uncommon and rare – you don’t build laws from the extremities. Passing laws like this is just pushing government more into the homes of “the common man” … (angelic choir ending…symbols ‘crashing’!)
The funny part? This (meddling) assemblywoman (Sally Lieber- Mountain View) introducing the bill isn’t even a parent. Hello?! (Should I pass laws telling middle-aged childless women how to live? I bet she wouldn’t like that, huh?) Her justification of passing such a thing is by using some really extreme examples of like 3 kids (out of what, 4 million in California?) being beaten by parents with tractors tires, tool shed steel doors, or something crazy like that. As if there aren’t any stringent child abuse or mandated reporting laws already in effect here.
But wait, there’s more! Like all laws, it does have a loophole. It exempts teachers and childcare workers. So if you want to spank your kid in California, hire a skilled professional – much like the mafia, or Brittany Spears.
You say you want more? If you live in California and want to write this assemblywoman, here’s the contact info. Here’s also the contact info for the “Governator” (Note: not for signing autographs on your “Buns of Steel” videos - although I can sign that for you…) Please remember, be respectful when writing to them. Keep it quick, short, and to the point -just like a real spank.