Sunday, October 29, 2006

Turning Colonel Sanders Into Pumpkin

Guess who’s greeting "Trick or Treaters" at my house this year? That’s right Colonel Sanders himself! When I lost the battle of costumes this year (the KFC costume tributes staring my daughter) to my wife, I knew there had to be some other way to get “the colonel” into Halloween. It came to me when my wife asked if I had any ideas for the Jack-O-Lantern pumpkin…I thought for a second and then yelled ”KFC Baby!!”
Then the rest was history. I had to make the pumpkin stencil myself in Illustrator and Photoshop, it’s actually kind of a hack job, but I didn’t have much time. The J.O.B. is having a pumpkin-carving contest Tuesday so this version had to work. Wish me luck; I think first prize is a vacation to Fiji (I wish - in reality $25 gift certificate). But that doesn’t matter; it’s all about stopping at KFC before the judging and sticking chicken in the pumpkin. And after judging, me eating that “Finger lickin' good” chicken. Because that's what Halloween is all about - candy and chicken in a bucket (pumpkin).

By the way! If you're interested in my Colonel Sanders pumpkin stencil pattern for some 'Colonel Magic' of your own, click on the image and then save it to your desktop. You can use it for free! I recommend using some Pumpkin Masters tools. They sell them at Target. Please don't post this on your own site as your own (that would make 'The Colonel' very angry)

Friday, October 27, 2006

Halloween Candy Everywhere- At Work And At Home

On November 1st, I’m going to have an additional 10 pounds added to my ass (actually spare tire, it all goes around the trunk first).

Yessiree, thanks to all the Halloween candy people have at their desks, candy people drop off at my desk, buckets just sitting in meetings, and candy practically thrown on every assistant’s desk on the way to the bathroom or parking garage. It just sits there waiting for me to eat it. My self-control goes away during this time of year but now I really need to control it.
When I was younger (pre-30) I could eat all of this stuff like nobody’s business. But now, I can’t. Something happened somewhere along 29, 30, 31, 32, I don’t know – “the metabolism” slowed down almost to a crawl. I swear if I didn’t go to the gym I would look like my Dad (Weird Al Yankovic in that “Bad” spoof - well, almost) and that wouldn’t be good. In fact, I go to the gym religiously to prevent that from ever happening.

So I make a promise to 'this here' mighty Internet: this is my last year of eating loads of candy from people’s desks. Next year, I’m just going to say “No”. Unless people have Peppermint Patty’s (I love peppermint patty’s!) or Twix (I love Twix!) and maybe Three Musketeers (I like that sometimes) But that’s it!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

When The Wife Overrides The Husbands Ideas For Their Toddler's Halloween Costume

So I lost the battle again this year. No Colonel Sanders, Chicken Suit & Bucket, Midget Sumo Wrestler, Gary Coleman (1983), Tattoo (from Fantasy Island), Pink Ninja (with evil bunny belt), or Accordion Monkey with a bag of pork grinds. No, not this year because my wife decided no daughter of hers was going to be any of those. She's a Fairy instead (not an evil one, punk rock one, fireworks one, or even Norwegian one) - just a Fairy (a really cute one though). I guess I can live with it. But next year, when she's talking more, she'll be asking for the Mr. T. costume - I can guarantee it!

We had some pictures taken of her in our neighborhood by a 'pro' photographer friend over the weekend. When you look at these, think of the costumes that could have been (I know I do...)-

Sunday, October 22, 2006

"No Thanks, I'll Pass On the $250 Oil Change"

I still can't believe I actually said this, last Friday, at the MINI/BMW dealership in nearby Calabasas. As I stood there, in uncomfortable silence, I really had hoped the service writer was going to say "Haa! Just kidding!" but that never happened. I began to wonder if they meant Pecos or Dollars. When I quickly discovered the service person was serious, I wondered who in their right mind would ever pay that much to have oil changed and how come I was there. Yes, I know car dealerships like to screw people, but with a jackhammer and a smile?

My wife really wanted a MINI Cooper a few years ago. We were in the market for a new car, and the price wasn't too bad (and gas prices were starting to shoot up fast, the car averages like 37-41mpg!) so a MINI seemed like the best idea around. Oh and the car "looks" pretty cool too. And as a bonus MINI/BMW picked up all the oil changes and maintenance for the first 36,000 miles. Those sure were the days...then when you get use to the VIP service, they stick it to you (and want to recoup their costs - like drug dealers!). In my mind I thought, "O.K. how much can an oil change really cost at the dealer...$50 at the most?". I was wrong. Very, very wrong. When I asked what the $250 included (I don’t know - Don Perignon with an Angry Thai Midget Massage perhaps?) the service woman answered ‘service with a smile, a visual check, Oil and a filter’. Oh, AND the hazardous waster fee of $3 was included (whoopee!). She also added that the changing of the micro-air filter was also overdue, and I was ‘strongly recommended’ to replace it - that part was $60 - but you needed the "air filter replacement service" which was $280 (plus tax). When I asked what my discounted price was (I always ask for a discount, even at Wendy's) she said she could possibly take %10 off, if the manager said "O.K.".

All was not lost though! I did get my car battery replaced when it mysteriously died, and a pretty nice car wash too (at no cost), but no oil change. So over the weekend, I was on a mission - I took the MINI to the nearby trusty Jiffy Lube, only to get 'shooed' away. They told me they don't work on fancy cars like MINI's (the last guy there that tried to work on one got some serious burns trying to remove the filter without some ‘magic tool’). And the other car shop across the street said they've never worked on one and don't carry the parts. And the third place said, "Sorry - why don't you try the dealer".

Driving all around town - I could hear the evil David Hasselhoff laughing at me, from BMW/MINI's headquarters in Germany. I wondered why nobody warned me about oil changes in these cars; how did it come to this. Was this car even worth it?

I can't criticize the car too much. Besides the stylish looks and good gas mileage, the oil doesn't need to be changes every 3,000 miles like other cars - only every 15,000 -which is a science marvel for people like me who still don't understand how a car even moves. But hell will freeze over before I spend $250 on a freakin' oil change! Even if I have to change the oil myself (God, I hope it doesn't come to that...!)

Friday, October 20, 2006

What’s With All The "Trying To Be Sexy" Girls Halloween Costumes?

O.K. so I’m not complaining about those sexy costumes made for adult women, I’m a guy, and if I complained about them I would be lying. If women want to dress as naughty Bo-peep’s or Wench Chamber-Maid Pirates, I’m all for it. In fact, I wouldn’t mind buying the wife the entire collection. We're adults.
The part that really upsets me is that some of those costumes are creeping down to the teen and girls categories. We’ve been getting a lot of those junk mail ads from the local Party Shops, and seriously - I was gasping at some of the costumes they’re trying to peddle onto little and teen girls. The stockings, big platform shoes, skirts - they look like strippers? I kept thinking “Not my daughter, EVER!!!” Seriously, what kind of parent would buy this stuff for their kid? (No, that picture isn't one of them, I'm not posting one). You have to be a pretty sick parent to let your daughter wear that stuff (be a parent and say “No!”) And what are these companies thinking to even make stuff like that. I’m fine with the cutesy girl costumes stuff like Princesses, Fairies, Animals, Taxi Driver, etc. That's expected.

What I want to know is - how did we go from those to Brittany-Stripper-Cheerleader-Bratz-Doll Hoochie's on amateur night costumes? Is this the first year of this, or am I just now noticing now that I’m a father of a girl…? Seriously, this is a father of a daughter worse nightmare.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Random Thoughts for Oct. 19

I don't really have anything to write about. So here's a bunch of stuff on my mind right now.

*I think I mentioned Kentucky Fried Chicken about 80 times this week during random conversations at work. Subconsciously, I really want one of those Little Chicken sandwich-things.

*We NetFlixed "Thank Your For Smoking" and "Click", I was laughing during the entire "Smoking" movie and "Click" really surprised me - it was a little depressing and had a "family message" in it. Is Adam Sandler growing up?

*After listening to Sting talk about his new album "Songs from the Labyrinth" on NPR, I bought it off iTunes. It's actually pretty good, but it makes me want to go to sleep in a castle, in the Irish countryside, in the year 1678.

*The U.S. just hit 300 million people this week. Scary!

*While at Disneyland last Saturday, I overheard a conversation of 2 teen guys in line for Space Mountain talk about how "hot" the girl playing Ariel was. It reminded me of my friends and I in college trying to pick up on the chicks who were costumed characters. At the time, I thought it would be cool to get "Belle's" number.

*My daughter went in for her 15-month check up.
She's in the 90th percentile for hieght and 50th for weight. I don't think I've ever met a parent whose kid is in the 50th for everything - does that kid exist?

*Fried Coke? First state fairs started deep frying Oreos, Candy Bars, Twinkies, Pickles on a stick and now Coke. I'm going to be the first to suggest deep frying butter and putting it on a stick. I'll make millions!

*Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.
I didn't want to see this movie when I first heard of it. But now that Kazakhstan is upset… I want to see it. On Netflix though.

*Work just gave me a new laptop - 17" MacBook Pro - Sweet! Has anybody tried Photo Booth? Some of the pictures I take of myself look pretty scary with all of the effects. Everybody around here got new Macs (I've always been on one) but now we all share the scariest pictures, hang them up around the office, and try to guess who it is.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Funny? I Didn’t Know I Was ‘Disabled’ or ‘Handicapped’?

Maybe now DMV will give me one of those placards so I can park in those parking spaces?

There’s this freaky woman, maybe late 30’s early 40’s, at work that is one of our writers. She’s a mother of a 6-year old, and is really weird and very hippie (but not in a good stylish way). Both her parents are grad professors at a local “elite” school, which explains a lot of her kookiness (Her parents: “over-educated”. She's told me stories of how they use to do things like dress her as a boy - or 'gender-neutral clothes'- told her the world was going to run out of food in 1977, and they probably had something against using conditioner in hair). Most of us just kind of pass her off as "a little goofy", no big deal - it’s people like her that make work (and the world) more interesting to talk about.

So yesterday I’m in the kitchen “nuking” my lunch, she came in while I was stirring my grub with a fork, in my left hand-

Crazy Hippie: Oh my gosh, you’re left-handed!

Me: Yup, all my life….

Crazy Hippie: Did you know that’s a HUGE physical and mental deformity…

Me: Whaaa?

Crazy Hippie:….human’s are suppose to be right-handed, the brain is (blah, blah, blah)…. Left-handers have a very documented history of mental anguish and usually die very early because the world isn’t made for them. I made sure my daughter NEVER used her left-hand. How do you deal with this? Are you making sure your daughter doesn’t use her left-hand? You wouldn’t want her to be handicapped her whole life too...!

Me: (blank stare, then smile). So if I destroy you now I can blame it on my left-handedness? (chuckle)

What kind of medieval things is this woman reading? Next thing you know she’ll be giving me leeches if I have a headache.
As for my daughter, we’re still not quite sure if she’s 'lefty' or a 'righty'. She just sort of uses whichever hand is closest to whatever she’s grabbing. She doesn't discriminate. But if she ultimately decides to be a lefty, that’s fine with me.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Weekend At Disneyland's Halloweentime And The Pumpkin Patch

We went to Disneyland on Saturday with a friend, her daughter and their exchange student from some country I can't pronouce (It may be the one Borak is from - I don't know...?). Usually this time of year is perfect (traditionally light-crowds, cool weather, etc.) but they started decorating the park for Halloween this year and now everybody and their neighbors pack the place - it's looked like a Summer Saturday. It's amazing to me that all Disneyland needs to do is put up decorations and people flock to the place like moths to a lightbulb. Overall we had fun, there's nothing quite like taking my daughter to Disneyland, it's like everything is visual overload for her.
Anyhow, we did something unlike us; we stayed until the park closed - nearly 1am. We're never doing that again - imagine a 15-month old staying up late and then waking up at the usually time the next day. The result is a cranky kid.

Sunday we went to a pumpkin patch called Lombardi Ranch way out in a place called Saugus (where the requirement to live there is a huge truck, SUV and an RV parked on the street). This pumpkin patch is actually really cool. They have corn mazes, tractor rides, farm animals, play areas for kids, and lots of junk food. I love the junk food!

We met some friends there who have a little girl who's only a few months older than our daughter. Watching them both was pretty entertaining for us adults. Between the other Dad and I we probably took about 6,000 pictures (Typical first kid syndrome, I know.)
An interesting part of our visit was the scarecrow contest in the sunflower fields. Local schools and scout troops did most of them. I was laughing at some boy scouts scarecrows who created monsters with blood and a sign that read "Pack 885 is coming to get YOU!!!"

And right next to that was the girl scouts (same age 9/10) with a rainbow and happy scarecrows picking flowers with a my little pony horses.

I kept thinking, when my daughter is that age, she'll probably work on a Colonel Sanders scarecrow holding a bucket of unhappy crows. That'll show them crows!

Friday, October 13, 2006

Weird Searches To Creative-Type Dad

I occasionally look at the searches to this blog once in awhile and get a good chuckle, then I get a little worried.

Recent ones:

-jack in the box kangaroo meat (I don't care - I still like the place)
-baby mullets (I'm all for them)
-chicken art (Chicken's are very artistic)
-18 ways to make a baby (Only 18?)
-black angus waitress (No, I've never been one)
-does chuck norris do any other type of exercise (Nope, only round-house kicks)
-how to draw dad (always smiling with a a gold grill)
-pictures of men getting forced haircuts (Isn't that all married mens haircuts? When the wife says "you need a haircut")
-i am a kid and i want be a actor (..please don't. Look what happened to "the coreys")
-creepy doodlebops (I get a lot of searches for this one)
-does good metabolism make me poop (yes!)
-evil clothes (how evil?)
-where can a man get a perm (Boy, I wish I knew...maybe in a time machine set to 1986. You could get a good one like Hall & Oates)
-clothes for twins of evil (I'm getting more and more searches with "evil" in it...?)
-rose nylund costume (That's cool! I can be Dorothy - she has just as much facial hair as me)

It's Friday the 13th! Random thoughts: it's my sister-in-laws birthday (very fitting for her); the wife and I were planning on going to see Def Leppard and Journey play tonight at the Hollywood Bowl, but my leather pants are still at the cleaners (they've been there since 1983) and the decent tickets were $150! For that price they better be pouring sugar on everybody.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Business Trips And Uncomfortable Conversations

Last week my job sent me on a short trip to San Diego for some ‘Focus Group Testing’. This is when they basically bring in kids and we sit behind a two-way glass (eating fancy food and drinks) and a moderator talks/shows stuff to the kids getting their opinions while the parents are outside eagerly awaiting a cool $90. I enjoy them and these things are usually entertaining and extremely helpful (for the super secret projects that I can’t talk about or I may wake up one day in some garage in Ohio).

If you’ve ever gone on a business trip the worse part about it is sometimes the co-workers you travel with. Sometimes they’re cool, and sometimes they’re weird. And sometimes they share awkward information you don’t really want to hear or know about. This one girl (Who’s 30 - I call anybody younger than me girl for some reason) started telling me and this other dude about how she’s leaving her husband in two weeks. Say what? Talk about something I didn’t want to hear about last week (after just going through my own family restraining order drama). So I did something I normally don’t do – stayed silent and let somebody else talk (it was tough). I don’t know, usually in tough life stages like this, all somebody needs is to just talk about it without interruption and they’ll usually figure it out on their own (hey, I think I just figured out what therapist do, and they charge more…). But she kept going on and on. I felt pretty bad.

Then she started asking questions about my own marriage and the other dude’s relationship with his partner (he’s gay and lives with his partner and their 6 year-old daughter –she’s from his partner’s previous hetero-relationship…). I told her where I met my wife (in Paris) and why I knew I wanted to marry her (a whole other post), the other dude went on about his deal (which was very Jerry Springer-like except with a happier ending). She then got really quiet and didn’t talk to anybody for the rest of the trip.

I have this weird theory, and it came up again when the other guy and I were talking when this girl wasn’t around. Most women friends, co-workers, acquaintances go through this strange mid-life crisis at around 30 when their lives aren’t going the way they wanted. This girl and her husband were talking about getting pregnant for years, but she kept putting it off, making excuses like “the kitchen needs to be remodeled first”, “we need to get our furniture first”, “we need to go to Burning Man first”…and it never ended. In reality, she didn’t really want kids with him and she didn’t even know why show got married to him in the first place (Oh yeah, her sisters, friends, and parents liked him, so she thought they knew something she didn’t know yet). Ouch! We both felt really bad for this guy we never met.

In the end, my only advice to her was that if she did get back with him, don’t have kids hoping it’ll fix the marriage or make things better. I grew up in a house like that and it really, really sucked. It took years for me to repair, and in most cases children of marriages like that never get repaired, it goes on forever.

I should write fortune cookies.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

It’s Hard To Believe She’s 15 Months Today

And time seems to be going by pretty quick.

I use to roll my eyes at parents who use to tell my wife and I, when we just came home with our daughter, things like “Why can’t they stay this little forever”, “This time goes by REAL fast, savor it”, “It’s the best right now, because they sleep and can’t move”.
You know what? My daughter is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen (even enough for me to even use the word “cute” which was not part of my vocabulary pre-dad), but I didn’t enjoy it that much. I didn’t enjoy the continuous sleeping; feeding that only the wife could do (‘cause of the boob-thing), holding her like she was delicate plutonium. From a Mother’s point-of-view it’s great, from a Dad’s, you kind of sterilize things, changes diapers, and dream of the days when she can run around, play and laugh at silly things. The early infant stage - it wasn’t fun. The fun part happens when they start reacting to things, walk/run, and play, learn words, and do really weird stuff. All of that has just kicked into high gear, and it’s really cool-

A few things that I find odd and very entertaining now:

-My daughter just discovered I have hair on my legs and arms and now tries to pull it. And it hurts, a lot. She then grabs her stuffed animals and does it to them, but they don’t yelp nearly as loud.

-After she drinks a bottle of Milk she acts a little intoxicated, like she’s just downed a bottle of Vodka. She lies down, moans and slaps the belly all while licking her Milk moustache and grabbing her tongue. When she does this, I want to dress her as a pirate.

-You can point at nearly anything and say it’s name and she’ll parrot it. For instance “Dog”, she’ll call it “Dawww”. Or “Light” is “Lieeeeee”, or “Barry White” is “Bebebebebe-fffff”.

-She likes to move the furniture around (chairs, barstools, her high chair), even at restaurants.

-Anytime you say, “dance”, she’ll stop what she’s doing and does this Bill Cosby/Elaine (from Seinfeld) dance combo. Sometimes she’ll even toss in sound effects.

-She makes piles of toys and stuffed animals which takes about 5-10 minutes and then when she’s done she’ll sit on it and look around. I’ve noticed the last few times she’ll actually poop.

All of that sterilizing, changing diapers, waiting on the sidelines, etc. was worth the wait.

Monday, October 09, 2006

How Does A Guy Compliment Another Guy On Loosing Weight?

The short answer: he doesn't.

There's this guy at work that has had a spare tire ever since I've known him. Well, it's actually more like a Tractor Tire (one of those big tractors that moves large hills). The guy had the worse eating habits I've seen in a long time (habits that I didn't even come close to in H.S. or college), everything he ate was either deep fried or can sit on a shelf for about 40 years and still be preserved inside a ship wreck. But in the last few months he's been snacking on nothing but fruit, nuts (sticks, rocks, leaves...) and salads. I have to admit, that takes some discipline and it's working.

So this morning some women at work were all standing out in the hall talking about how impressive it is that he's done this, they then followed it up with compliments to him and then they asked me if I've noticed. My short answer was "yeah" but keeping within the "guy code of honor", I was following the centuries old tradition by not saying anything about it. Seriously, there's nothing more strange than two guys sitting around talking about how big their butts and thighs look. It just doesn't happen. When guys compliment each other it's more like "Hey Dude, I bet you can outrun a bull if it were chasing you after you took its Pork Grinds" or something like that. In guy language that means "Hey, you've lost weight, so now the Hooters waitresses will probably refill your drink without asking".

Friday, October 06, 2006

Unique Toddler Costume Ideas That Will Make The Other Kids (Parents) Envious

Since I was asked, why not. I’m not writing about Dora, Disney Princess, Power Ranger or stuff like that - those aren’t very exciting. I’m throwing out ideas that will make a statement to the world! Or at least to the neighbors…

Alf- Toddlers and Alf are about the same size. How cool would it be to teach a kid to say “Yo, Willie!” or “HA!” in Alf’s signature alien Melmakian voice. They can even get into the role while “Trick or Treating” by asking for dryer lint and tossing in the family cat instead of Chocolate and Gum.

Tattoo from Fantasy Island
– I think it’s funny when little kids are dressed as adults. But if they’re dressed like Tattoo, wow! That would be really something. People will probably mistake them for the real guy. Even better, have Dad (or Mom) dress like Mr. Rourke and instead of saying “Trick or Treat” announce, “Smiles Everyone, Smiles!”.

Chewbacca – If I have a boy on kid #2. He’s going to be Chewbacca and I’ll teach him how to growl after ringing the doorbell real loud.

Gollum from Lord of the Rings – And when people toss candy into the kids’ bag, teach them to look in it immediately and say “My Precious” in a sinister voice.

1970’s Jumpsuit Elvis – With the porkchop sideburns, sunglasses and the cape. And when people give candy teach them the shotgun finger routine and have them say something like “Thank Ya’ very much”, or “I like your Cadillac”. (This is my future son’s 2nd Halloween Costume)

If anybody else has any ideas, jot them on your own blog or leave a comment.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Things That Cheer Me Up These Days

With all the recent drama, its been a little tough to get back into my old self. I’ve always made it a point not to dwell on “bad” things, but to focus more on the positive. It’s not that I ignore the bad; I just never really forget.
Anyhow, a few things that make me feel pretty good about life right now:

1. Watching my daughter play. She’s nearly 15 months and is does the craziest things. She finds the simplest stuff utterly fascinating. Things like hiding blocks in strange places like my sock drawer, making piles of toys and then sitting on them and laughing, poking the top of her head at the edge of the table so I can just see her eyes, then giggles, hides and does it again. It’s things like this that makes the worse days seem not so bad.

2. My wife. I can’t even explain how lucky I am. She can sense anything I’m thinking or feeling. It’s creepy, like mental telepathy in a David Lynch movie (minus the midgets on tricycles).

3. Videos posted on YouTube by strange people with the same humor as me.
I admire these people who go through the trouble to do this because now it’s not too much of an effort to find this crazy stuff.

4. The upcoming Food and Wine festival this weekend.
And it’s walking distance from my house, which is a huge plus. Two of my favorite hobbies food and wine. Now if Gary Coleman were there serving wine – well, that would be just too cool!

5. The stuff I’m working on at work. I have to admit I really like my job. I can’t tell anybody what I’m working on, but it’s really, really cool. Whenever I attend a focus group or testing, people really eat this stuff up. One of these days, I’ll write about it. I’m just too afraid company eyes will find this blog and then I’ll end up waking up one day, tied to a cactus, 70 miles outside Vegas.

6. Coming up with costumes ideas for Halloween (I still can’t believe its already October). Last year I wanted to be Colonel Sanders and then dress my daughter up as a chicken and then put her in a bucket. This year, I want to break out my accordion, dress her up like a Monkey and give her a can (to put candy in). But the wife doesn’t think that’s a good idea.

Monday, October 02, 2006

The Court System And Restraining Orders

I can finally write about this. This isn’t a normal post today; this is something very serious. I’ve thought a lot about whether or not I should write this. But I feel my experience could possibly be of help to somebody now, or in the future. So if you’re looking for something upbeat, you’ll probably want to visit tomorrow or the next day, or next week.

About 3 weeks ago I started getting threatening phone calls directed at my family. I’ve never had anybody in my life try to terrorize/harass/threaten the life of me and my family - ever (this is crazy stuff that happens to “other people”, or only seen in movies or the news), so imagine my shock that this was actually happening to me. Normally I shrug crazy people off but the person doing this stuff actually has a very physically violent history and has followed up words with actions on more than a few instances - A person that I haven’t personally seen in about 7 or 8 years, at least. And have had no regular communication with in about 12 or 13 years.
I've had about enough after 2 days when this person left a real threat to come after my family and I, so I went to the local Sheriff station with my wife (who was completely freaked out), I was advised to go get a temporary restraining order immediately. I’m not sure if people are aware of this, or have even tried or have known of anybody that has gone through this process, but it literally sucks. I had to wait nearly 6 hours to finally speak to a Judge sitting through felony trials, DUI cases, civil whatever’s, etc. When my turn finally came up the Judge asked about 5 or 6 questions, granted it, and then set a court date - which was today.

What most people must be thinking right now is “why?” What happened to cause this? The short version: I reported a known and admitted child molester to my father's family to keep him away from a family reunion. And this pedophile just didn’t molest one boy – more like 8 that are known. And I got some major retaliation for it because some people are willing to do anything to shield and protect these monsters so they can still interact with kids. There are some serious F’d up people in this world.

I did end up getting the permanent order earlier today, the Judge agreed that the person doing the threatening is pretty dangerous after providing 7 declarations, playing recorded messages, and giving some back-story. Thankfully the person didn’t show up (which built a lot of anxiety wondering). In the end the court system does work. It just takes a lot of time, preparation, and effort.

After speaking to a few close friends today, I got asked this a few times - if I should have just stayed quiet and was it was worth speaking up – most people don’t. Yes! Absolutely, because it was the right thing to do.

And do you want to know the clincher to this whole thing? This person is my biological mother. Who now has a permanent restraining order coming to her later this week by Marshal. The pedophile is her uncle, and the victims are her brothers and a whole lot of cousins.

If anybody out there wants to know how to put a domestic violence restraining order case like this together or needs advice, I would be more than willing to help. I have lots of good information. I did get a little legal help and it really helped, but you generally don’t need it in cases like this. Feel free to email me and I promise; I’ll help as much as I can.