Wednesday, March 23, 2011

When Everything Seems to be Falling Apart…

There’s just something odd about getting really sick just before a birthday…

I was out of commission for a while with severe pneumonia. If you’ve never had it, consider yourself lucky because it just downright “sucks.”
From the loads of medications they put me on, to the weird feeling of pins in my chest while breathing, to waking up at 3:00AM completely awake and seeing (and sometimes looking forward to watching) “Saved by the Bell: The College Year’s” for an entire week -- it was just all enough to outright freak me out.

The entire experience was all a bit ironic as one long time friend was just diagnosed with leukemia last November, but is thankfully on the mend, and another had pneumonia nearly a year ago and was even hospitalized for it.
I remember thinking on those occasions – “Wow! When did we get so old that stuff like this can just happen seemingly out of nowhere?” I’m not even 40 yet! What’s going to happen then? Hair loss and maybe my colon falls out when enjoying a KFC Sunday bucket?

God, I hope not. I just want to enjoy my chicken in peace.

Now I’m wondering when we’re all at the point when we’re comparing war stories with each other of how many meds we’re on, how many days we’ve been hospitalized in just the past 6 months, and who can shoot lasers out of their eyes with all of the robotic pieces inside of them.

Come to think of it, I really wouldn’t mind laser-shooting eyes. That would actually be kind of cool.

So tell me folks, what ails have you had and lived to tell about? But most importantly did Zack and Kelly ever get married?

Friday, March 04, 2011

MISSING: My Daughter’s 2 Imaginary Friends!

A funny thing happened when my son was born 9 months ago - my daughter’s 2 longtime colorful imaginary friends, “Sauna and Nana” just sort of disappeared.

I’m actually a little sad about this discovery because I really enjoyed hearing their stories of globetrotting the world in an instant. Their superhuman abilities to stay up late every night and never get tired or cranky. Their super advanced skin that never required bathing and could still remain cleaner than a sink. Their mysterious ability to eat candy for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but still have spotless teeth and a thriving immune system.

I was even fond of their parents, Chuck and Doris (I swear she made those up on her own) but sadly never had a chance to meet because they worked for all sorts of famous people like, the Wiggles, the Doodlebops, Lionel Richie, and as of last year Justin Bieber.

When I inquired as to their whereabouts at dinner tonight my daughter said with confidence that the last time she saw them they were going to get candy in Paris but never came home.

Maybe they got lost in Ohio?

So I put together this MISSING IMAGINARY FRIENDS poster hoping we could find them:

"Missing Imaginary Friends Poster" (click to print)

And since we’re looking for Sauna and Nana, my daughter was hoping to find her MISSING UNICORN she lost last year at IKEA as well:

"Missing Unicorn Poster" (click to print)

And since we’re open to helping friends, I hear Lionel could use some help too:

Are you looking for Lionel Richie?
"Hello, Is it me you're looking for?"
(click to print)