Saturday, February 19, 2011

When you give a 5-year old an iPhone…


She’ll ask for some games just like the ones on the phones of her friends’ parent’s.

She’ll play a game called “Smurfs' Village” and “accidently” buy $10 worth of Smurberries because her father just downloaded the game for her 10 minutes earlier.

After awhile she’ll ask for more Smurfberries so Smurfette can have a house to live in.

He’ll say “no” approximately fifty times and ask what happened to the other Smurfberries.

She’ll stop asking because she’s discovered Angry Birds. Then she’ll ask him to buy the Mighty Eagle that some kid told her about.

Her father will say “no” approximately fifty more times.

Then she’ll discover the phone’s camera and take about 2,000 pictures in roughly 30 minutes with a Polaroid app called “Shake-it Photo” primarily because she has to shake the pictures to see them.

Her father finds them entertaining, chooses a few to post, and attach titles to them.

“The Day the World was Photographed after I bought $10 Worth of Smurfberries”

"Victims of the housing crisis"

"Excessive Neighbor Girl"

"School Reform Bear"

"Stinky Blanket"

"Angry Elephant waiting for iPad 2"


Then the 5-year old went to bed, but before she lays her hear down she'll ask her father to harvest her Smurfs' village potatoes while she's asleep.

8 comments:

Scott said...

That's absolutely hilarious--and the photos aren't bad for a 5-year-old, maybe she's a prodigy!

Who's the "Excessive Neighbor Girl" though--I can't help but wonder if there's a budding "Imelda Marcos" in the neighborhood!

I didn't even know the "Smurfs" were still around! I never liked them, nor disliked them--they seemed okay to me (unlike the politically-correct, ridiculously-sappy "Barney" that came along later).

But my college roommate, Ken, really despised the Smurfs--so much that he had a stuffed "Papa Smurf" hanging from the dorm-room window, with a noose around its neck! I actually asked him to take it down a few times, because it looked so creepy in the dark!

Troglodad said...

Wow- you're so lucky. At least she didn't drop it into the couch. The recliner couch, where there's all these scissor-like mechanisms that enable the foot rest to pop out. Quite the contortion act to get off the couch without closing the mechanism and crushing said phone.

No, wait. I dropped it. When she jerked a blanket we were sharing off my lap, sending the phone flying.

And she thinks I'm goign to let her HOLD the phone? Yeah, right...

painted maypole said...

my daughter asks me to put games for her on my iphone now and then and I always say no.

because if she's playing angry birds when will I play Words with Friends????

Susan said...

Love the those pictures!

ArtistUnplugged said...

Cute! Great pictures, a creative-type little girl!

DGB said...

The Bean gravitated to Angry Birds all by himself. Now we're both hooked.

Damn birds.

E said...

Which ummmm I am willing to bet he at least considered if he didn't actually do

full queen outlast blanket white said...

Really nice post I like this very much and mostly kids do insist to take the iphone for playing games and they want to take photo.
Thank you for sharing.